Kids Loved It!

Monday, November 30, 2009

Apparently, the children were very excited when the Macy's Parade featured a new balloon:

It made the kids want to hide in the attic.

Chip Caray and TBS Part Ways

Richard Sandomir writes in the NY Times,

Chip Caray’s tenure as TBS’s lead major league baseball announcer ended Monday when he and the cable network agreed to part ways.

Caray’s high-volume style was mixed with a penchant for bad play calls, embellishments and factual errors. His best known incident occurred during the American League Central Division tie breaker between the Twins and the Tigers in October. He called an obvious lineout this way: “Line drive. Base hit. Caught out there. The runner tags. Throw to the plate. On target. And in time! A double play!”

In a memo sent to company employees, David Levy, the president of Turner Sports, wrote on Monday: “Since the end of this year’s M.L.B. playoffs, we’ve had several discussions with Chip Caray regarding 2010 and beyond. Both sides have agreed that now is the right time for Turner Sports and Chip to move ahead on different paths.”

Caray had some time left on his contract with Turner, where he also called Braves games on the Peachtree TV cable network. Levy said the company was looking at a “number of candidates” to replace Caray at both positions.

Through a TBS spokesman, Levy declined to comment.

Caray has called TBS’s Sunday game of the week for the past two seasons and was the network’s No. 1 playoff announcer since 2007.

Caray has also called Chicago Cubs games.

The Home-Town Critic

"According to, the Mets are close to re-signing RHP Elmer Dessens."

-Some homeless guy's Christmas wish is coming true: Dessens back in Queens!

"According to the New York Post, Ike Davis’s dad, former Major League 1B Ron Davis, believes his son will play 10 to 15 years in the big leagues, and, “he’ll do things to sacrifice for the team."

-Oh really? My dad said I'll be a NBA player one day. Now, I live in his basement.

"Alex Cora has agreed to 1-year, $2 million deal to return to the Mets if he passes a physical," says Mr. Bart.

-Alex RODRIGUEZ, Omar. Argh! You got the wrong one, Minaya!

"According to the Daily News, a bidding war may be on tap between the Yankees and Red Sox for Blue Jays RHP Roy Halladay."

-Wilpons found under office table in Citi Field. "Wa-ar?," Fred cried.

Jerry Jeterfeld

Sunday, November 29, 2009

There is a new #2 in New York...

Hellloooo, Jerry!

Elf'ilicious (Video)

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Elf Yourself elves take over Union Square in New York with a dancing flash mob.

This is becoming a hot move throughout the world; spontaneous group dancing on public streets. ImprovEverywhere is known for it, as well as Nefesh B'Nefesh in Israel.

Mike'd Up, Up, and Away! (Video)

Tirico Suave reports,
In his never-ending quest to deport Jets QB Mark Sanchez, Big Mikey Francesa tried to persuade the Jets into benching him.

He used Troy Aikman as an example, explaining that Jimmy Johnson benched his star rookie quarterback after struggling.

There was only one problem: Aikman was forced to the bench due to injury, not poor performance.

Former Cowboys coach Jimmy Johnson, who was on Mike’d Up earlier today, reminded Mike of this fact.

Hotel Fire Alarm Gives Wake-Up Call To Jets

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Apparently, it didn't do good enough of a job.

Chris Chase writes:

In the first half of a big divisional game against the New England Patriots, the New York Jets came out sluggish, getting outscored by 17 points and converting just two first downs over the first 30 minutes. Maybe it's because the team was still tired from Saturday night.

Late Saturday night, a fire alarm was pulled in the Jets' team hotel, rousing members of the team out of their slumber and forcing them to vacate their rooms. Except there was no fire and it was the Jets' team hotel. You do the math.

According to the time stamp on a tweet from tight end Dustin Keller, the fire alarm was pulled around 1 a.m.:

So much for a good nights sleep..the alarm just went off in our teams hotel hahaha grown men walking around the hallway in their draws haha

He's pretty good-natured about it. I certainly wouldn't give one "ha" about getting awakened in the middle of the night, let alone three. Especially if I was wearing "draws."

Cornerback Kerry Rhodes(notes) also posted a tweet about the late-night wake-up call, but he waited until the morning to share:

you know we are playing new england when in the middle of the night when u r sleep somebody pulls a fire alarm to wake u up!! wow!!

The same thing happened to the Buffalo Bills before a Week 1 game in New England. It sounds like there's a fan (or fans) who still like to pull middle school pranks to help support the team. Or maybe it's not a fan at all. Judging by his past history, I wonder if Bill Belichick has an alibi for last night?

First Lady's First Picture

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Search for Michelle Obama’s name via Google’s image search and you’ll likely find an image that has been characterized as a racist caricature of the first lady of the US in the top results:

For more on this, check out the original source.

Money Gain on 'Oh, The Pain!'

A Black-Friday special:

Excerpts from the book include, "Spring Training is like non-alcoholic beer" and "I'm not into the whole twitter thing."

Props to JohnInga.

Marriage Kid-vice

Recently, kids were asked to give advice on the topic of marriage:

How do you decide who to marry?

You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
-- Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
-- Kristen, age 10

What is the right age to get married?

Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
-- Camille, age 10

How can a stranger tell if two people are married?

You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
-- Derrick, age 8

What do you think your mom and dad have in common?

Both don't want any more kids.
-- Lori, age 8

What do most people do on a date?

Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
-- Lynnette, age 8 (Isn't she a treasure?)
On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
-- Martin, age 10

When is it okay to kiss someone?

When they're rich.
-- Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
-- Curt, age 7
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
-- Howard, age 8

Is it better to be single or married?

It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
-- Anita, age 9 (Bless you child)

How would the world be different if people didn't get married?

There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
-- Kelvin, age 9

How would you make a marriage work?

Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck.
-- Ricky, age 10

You're Not The Boss Of Me Now

Click on the pic to magnify:

I salute you, Dilbert.

Blog Update

We will be writing about (way cool) things, other than the Mets, in the near future.

Don't worry... We still will cover those Mets like a warm blanket!

Celebration 2006: Lastings Milledge

Monday, November 23, 2009

Milledge's first drink...

...was probably also his last.

What Was That Award?

The Onion is reporting:

A number of players suggested to reporters Monday that, with accolades such as the AL Platinum Baseman Award and the Best Lead Off of the Year Trophy, the Baseball Writers' Association of America was almost certainly making up its year-end honors on the spot. "When they were calling out the names of the awards and players, they were stammering and saying 'um' and 'uh' a lot," said Tampa Bay Rays slugger and 2009 Best Batting Gloves Award winner Evan Longoria. "I'd never heard of that award until five minutes ago. Same with the Pretty Good Bunter Award." Longoria added, however, that if there is now such a thing as the Hitter of the Year Goblet, he might as well try to win it.

After Fernando Tatis won the 2008 Comeback-Player-Of-The-Year Award, he was given the 2009 Please-Don't-Come-Back-Player-Of-The-Year Award. Tatis proclaimed, "I am Numero Uno!" while waving the trophy, designed with two bats forming an "X", high in the air.

SNY = So Not YES

Sunday, November 22, 2009

So, apparently, 3 losing seasons won't toughen some men up...

Didn't think I hit ya that hard, Burk-soft.

The ____ Bridge

I originally posted this blog post in May of 2009. The Mets finally named the bridge in the month of November. Why do I bring it up now? I refer you to the 2nd comment on the bottom of this post.

It needs a name.

Many of the fans who have been out to Citi Field have walked on it; the Nameless Bridge out in center field. It's a beautiful piece in a beautiful ball park. The only downside it has is that it makes for awkward conversation with an Usher.

"Uh...Usher...How do I get to the Shake Shack out in Center?"

"You can call me, Ush. Just take that bridge over on your right, cross it over and go 'bout 20 yards and you'll be sippin your way to a brain freeze in no time."

"Great, thanks! Is there a name for the bridge so I'll know to look out for a sign?"

"No, it's just 'bridge'."

"'s not named after anyone in specific?"

"Well, there was a Mike Bridge who was casted to be in the original 'Flinstones - Real Life Movie' but it's got nothing to do with him. Nothing at all."

"Er, okay, thanks, Ush. Over the ____, I go."

True story. It actually happens every day out in Citi. Until now.

We NEED you to come up with a name for it (and then we shall decide on the winner). Although the Mets are asking the "season ticket holders" to send in their favorite names for the bridge (and they will then choose which one they like best), we, the poor fans who have to buy - sob - smaller packages to get into the games will stick to the best name chosen HERE, on this website.

So get at it, folks, start usin that noggin, and let's bridge that nameless gap out in deep center field.

A Walk In The Park

A friend, Skeptic Al, recently showed me around Citi Field being that he has it "in" with the corporate fellows in the Mets new Home of Amazin. The place is huge! But what made the day most memorable was that towards the end of the tour, we noticed an office door with a nameplate along side it. We didn't think much into it...until we read what it said.

We were a bit reluctant to knock on the door being that Mr. Met is known to sleep during the day (especially if there is a night game on that day, er).

Overcome with emotion, we banged lightly (is that even possible?) on the Ball-Headed's office door. Nothing. We tried again. Still nothing. We then realized that Mr. Met is a (cute) mute and we wouldn't even hear him if he was calling us in.

Not believing Mr. Met was actually inside, Skeptic Al opened the door slowly. He was, after all, skeptical. As he opened the door, we spotted a desk with an array of items upon it. Ball-care products, shoe-trees for what looked like a size 20 shoe and a tissue box as big as Mo Vaughn's belly. The latter probably being for after those hard-to-get-over games. Poor Mr. Met.

But the pity didn't last long. Once the door was fully open, we got a nice view of how Mr. Met lives. Quite lavishly, if I was to say the least.

Mr. Met was currently not in his digs so we felt free to poke around. A picture of Mrs. Met was on the nightstand, as well as a toothbrush (I did not know his mouth even opened), a Brooklyn Cyclones schedule and a book titled, "Life - How To Have A Ball." We were halfway through his closet (which featured all of the same outfits that we all have come to know and love)when we heard the sound of footsteps behind us. Ah, it was too late. We were caught red-handed, by our beloved team's mascot.

We turn around, only to see Oliver Perez standing behind us. He muttered something about, "trying to locate his fastball" and he ran off glancing in all directions.

"Phew," we sighed. Close call. We finish checking out the closet and make our way to the bathroom. It looks small from the outside but we knew Mr. Met lives large. Matter of fact, we didn't realize how large.

We walk in and are greeted by Mr. Met's Indoor Pool Home Theatre Room. A toilet the size of Texas is on our far right but we are in awe of our friend's pool/movie/whatever-the-heck-he-calls-it contraption.

Seconds later, Skeptic Al is on the phone with MTV's "Cribs - The Mascot's Digs" telling them how they must bring a camera to Flushing. I nod in agreement; anything to make the Fanatic jealous.

Ignoring Oliver as he runs by the door again, we decide it is time to leave. Mr. Met could be back at any moment and God knows what that man would do to someone in the privacy of his own (LAAARGE) home. We step over a T-Shirt Launcher that was wildly thrown in the middle of the room and make our way to the 10 foot tall door. I would say we were about 3 foot from the door when the shadow was cast; a shadow, unmistakably, belonging to Mister Bartholomeus Alexander Quincy Met. A.K.A. - Mr. Met.

"Uh oh, we are done for," I twittered to my followers. As this was taking place, Skeptic Al wet his pants and began to shiver. We had nowhere to run, nowhere to hide and if we had, Al would certainly have left a trail.

Trembling in our shoes, we look up to see Mr. Met smiling the way he usually does. His eyes, hands, and facial expressions all say "happy, happy, happy." He gives us a 3 minute bear hug as we try to gasp for breath - he apparently has no beef with us. Even more than that, he allows us to conduct an interview with him (although he remains silent through-out) and he gave us a thorough tour of the place (with us making it seem as if it was our first time seeing it).

What a relief!

All in all, we had a great day. We met our mascot, we shook Johan's LEFT hand, we even signed the wall in the Ebbets Club! We just couldn't be happier!

Although...we can't figure out why Jay Horowitz and Omar Minaya were violently waving to us from the rear view mirror as we pulled out of the parking lot...

Oh, well. Let's Go Mets!

If the Mets played basketball...

Saturday, November 21, 2009

NBA Blogger, J.E. Skeets, writes,

Funny moment from Saturday's marquee Anti-NBA Finals game: 0.5 seconds left in the first quarter. New York Knicks inbound the ball to guard Nate Robinson(notes). The New York guard, for whatever reason, turns and purposely heaves a 30-foot shot at the wrong basket. Goes in. Cue hilarity and Mike D'Antoni mustache rage.

Now, as you can see, the shot came just after the buzzer. But still, that didn't stop the Knicks coach from giving Nate a little piece of his mind. D'Antoni was livid. He even stormed a few feet onto the court to yell.

Nate's response: "What? What?"

If that doesn't perfectly sum up the Knicks' 2009-10 season, I don't know what does.

Omar Minaya has begun speaking with Robinson's agent. Details to come.


As a fellow, Fonz, said on Twitter, "I'm a Mets fan, but I still thought this was funny.

Ditto, Fonzy.

Hey, Man! (Part 2)

Friday, November 20, 2009

Hey, Man! is our very special off-season series that will outline how exactly Jon Heyman behaves rudely, illogically and in today's case, like a tool.

Rich Lederer writes for,

"Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?"

- Coldplay, Viva La Vida

Jon Heyman has done it again. He broke another story on Friday when reporting that Jason Varitek had "reached a two-year agreement with the Red Sox."

In typical Heyman fashion, he wanted to make sure that everyone knew that " was the first to report that Varitek had an agreement with Boston." To that, I say "big deal." OK, maybe I didn't use the word "deal." I mean, this doesn't go down as some sort of exclusive or investigative reporting.

While the signing won't be officially announced until Varitek completes his physical, the Red Sox had placed a Friday deadline on an official proposal that was delivered via registered mail to him and agent Scott Boras on January 23. In other words, it was no secret that something was going to happen that day. Either Varitek was going to accept or reject Boston's offer.

If you're wondering how Heyman got wind of the news before any of the Boston beat writers or columnists, be aware that he had Mark Teixeira going to the Yankees before anyone else and, according to his biography, also "broke the story of Barry Bonds going to the Giants in 1992...Alex Rodriguez going to the Yankees in 2004, A-Rod opting out of his $252-million contract in 2007 and Manny Ramirez going to the Dodgers in 2008."

Varitek. Teixeira. Manny. A-Rod 2x. Bonds, vintage 1992. Do you notice anything in common? Yes, all of these players are or were represented by Boras at the time of their signings. It is plainly obvious that Heyman, known among fellow writers as, is getting fed such stories by Scott himself, which is fine and dandy except there is more going on here than meets the eye.

You see, Boras throws Heyman a bone on a Tek or Tex signing but also uses him to spread rumors about the level of interest and terms in ongoing free agent negotiations to create a false sense of demand. Teams that fall for this trick wind up competing against themselves, which is exactly what Boras desires.

While Boras is no fool, Heyman is a tool for the Scott Boras Corporation. Boras knows how to game the system to get the best deals for his clients and will gladly use Heyman as long as the latter plays along or until the market realizes what is going on. As it stands now, it's almost as if Heyman, who is no stranger to the Boras suites during the winter meetings, is on the SBC payroll.

You can see these shenanigans at work in Heyman's recent stories about a few other Boras clients, including Joe Crede, Oliver Perez, and Derek Lowe. But these are relatively innocent in comparison to following the Boras, Heyman & Co. saga as it relates to Manny. (To see all the proofs, click here).

Shout out to EddiePerez23 for the find.

To see why exactly Heyman blocked me on Twitter, click here. You'll laugh. Then think Jon has issues. Then feel bad for laughing.

Don't Mets With Trevor

Trevor Ariza loses a shoe.

Eli From Brooklyn gains a blog post.

A zoom up of the shoe reveals him to be wearing a Mets sneaker:

Crazy, I know.

2 Unrelated but Must See Clips

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

So where are your donations to the local hospital going?

Check this out:

Employees of a Portland hospital put together the above video to generate breast cancer awareness throughout their hospital system.

Central hosting Zachary High School goes for two. Quarterback Will Briscoe throws behind the back hitting wide open Shedrick Davis, resulting in Jim Rome discussing it on his show and me placing it on this blog.

Need a Fixing? In the Rick of Time!

Rick Peterson could fix a pitcher in 15 minutes but he can't fix his Twitter Pic for 15 secs?

I'm sure the Brewers are going to be thrilled!

$10 Mets Crocs (with Free Shipping or 10% off)

Update: Enter secondchance to receive 15% off.

Gotta love crazy deals!

For the Mets Crocs, click here. For other sports teams, click there which is now here.

LeBron To The Mets!

It looks like a bad case of the photoshop, but in truth, it's a legitamate picture found all over the interweb.

LeBron James, in a statement on Tuesday, declared, "I want to be a Met in 2010."

James announced, "I've always been a Mets fan ever since they acquired David Wright in the 80's. I thought it was amazing winning it all in '76, when the ball evaded Jimmy Buckner of the White Sox. It truly is a special blessing to be able to play for the New York Metropoliticians."

James' agent, Scott Boredas, said that LeBron would be most comfortable DH'ing in Queens.

Waving Him From 3rd to 1st

After Chip Hale was said to be replacing Razor Shines as the Mets 3B Coach in 2010, I felt it was only appropriate to ask Shines the question in the Ask Box.

He mumbled something about his 12 rings and threatened to send me home on an infield pop. Yikes.

If you want to give "The 3rd Base Coach Of Life 2009" a try, then head on over here.

Jerry Manuel In Trouble?

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Dave Jauss is the Mets' new bench coach.

Funniest thing is:

So is Jerry Manuel's job in jeapordy? Well, it wouldn't be the first time Jerry was succeeded by Mr. Jauss!

Take a look at Jauss' Wiki Page:

Original Post:

Ken Rosenthal of writes,

Dave Jauss is the Mets' new bench coach, according to major-league sources.

An announcement is expected Wednesday or Thursday.

Jauss, 52, previously has worked as a bench coach for three teams — the Red Sox, Dodgers and Orioles.

Former Indians manager Eric Wedge, former Mariners and Diamondbacks manager Bob Melvin were among the other candidates the Mets considered.

For someone as experienced as Wedge or Melvin, the Mets' position might have been a steppingstone; Mets manager Jerry Manuel, coming off a 70-win season, is entering the last year of his contract.

Jauss, however, has never managed in the majors, and will be considered far less of a threat to Manuel than other candidates would have been.

Winnie-ng It All

“If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.” -Winnie The Pooh

Whether the Wilpons didn't sign Manny Ramirez last offseason because they knew something the fans didn't know (Hint: Maternity Drugs) or because they mostly don't adhere to the fans word is something that may never be determined.

If Mets Ownership makes some big acquisitions this offseason - is that a result of the fans' wants or the ownership understanding that they won't be making "enough" money if their product is below-average? Is it as a result of both reasons? If so, the latter is probably the bigger factor.

Either way, let's get Jeff and Fred some Q-Tips.

1/2 Chance A Champ Will Be In Queens?

Many hope of hosting a mega-fight between Floyd Mayweather Jr. and Manny Pacquiao, who recently defeated Miguel Cotto.

Mark Kriegel, of Fox Sports, writes:

The list of parties who've contacted promoter Bob Arum in hopes of hosting include the Yankees and the Mets, the Jets and the Giants, the Cowboys, a consortium of Nevada businessmen, and a former Presidential advisor.

First off, you can forget about Yankee Stadium or Citi Field, where municipal, state and other assorted taxes would result in a 15 percent levy against the combatants' purses. "There's no conceivable way the fight can take place in New York City because of the tax structure," Arum said Monday afternoon.

New Jersey, where the Jets and Giants play, isn't much better, unless your lobbyist is a Soprano. More promising is an idea advanced by Bill Clinton's former consigliere, James Carville. Under that scenario, Pacquiao and Mayweather would meet in New Orleans' Superdome. "Louisiana has a much smaller tax," said Arum, "and Carville is talking to the governor about getting a waiver."

Then there's Texas, with no state income tax, and a stadium that holds up to 111,000 for football.

And don't forget Las Vegas, where Arum says he has a group willing to build a makeshift outdoor stadium to seat 30,000.

Not bad for a dead sport, huh?

Eli: Who ever thought I could be excited about going to Citi Field in 2010?

Takahashi's Cousin?

Should the Mets replace Takahashi with Takahashi?

Bobbie Dittmeier, of MLB, writes:

Left-handed pitcher Hisanori Takahashi, who recently completed his 10th season with the Yomiuri Giants of Japan, declared free agency on Tuesday and said that he wants to play in the Major Leagues.

Takahashi, 34, was 10-6 with a 2.94 ERA in 25 games this past season. He was 79-66 with a 3.70 ERA in 245 career games for Yomiuri.

Takahashi's best season was 2007, when he went 14-4 with a 2.75 ERA in 28 games. He saved 15 games in 2006, when the Giants used him as a reliever.

"I decided I wanted to try out for the Majors three days ago," Takahashi said, according to "If I didn't have confidence in myself, I wouldn't have made the decision. I want to go to a team that needs me. I'd be extremely happy if I'm used as a starter."

Takahashi started Game 4 of the Japan Series against the Nippon Ham
Fighters and lost, giving up five runs on six hits in five innings in an 8-4
loss. The Giants won the series, four games to two.

Takahashi said at a news conference that he wants to follow in the footsteps of former teammates Hideki Matsui and Koji Uehara. Matsui is a free agent after playing the past seven seasons with the Yankees. Uehara signed as a free agent with the Orioles in January and went 2-4 with a 4.05 ERA in 12 starts.

"It's a dream I have," Takahashi said. "And I'd like to attain that dream. Seeing Uehara in the Majors, that made me want to go to the Majors even more. I want to return to the days of being a rookie and take on this new challenge."

Wall-y's Place

Citi Field's starewells are being painted with New York Mets colors (and shockingly, San Francisco Giants colors, too).

Hat Tip to Mets Police for the find:

Okay, so the only picture I have seen is with orange paint and my sources have not yet confirmed that this is even Citi Field.

Either way, Go Giants, er...

New York!

Seaver The Day!

Happy 65th Birthday, Tom!

2010; The Team To Meet

UPDATE 11/17/09:

The time has come. Embrace it. Get involved.

Wherever you turn - television, radio, blogs - one can't help but notice that the 6th biggest sport in America has commenced its season.

Welcome, Hot Stove.

"Should we resign the catcher? Do you think Boston would make a trade
like that? Is he worth a 2 year contract? What was his OBS in 2009? He's
like 39 years old, I don't know..."

Ah, questions...questions...more questions...

We've got your answers! Regarding the Mets, at least.

Left Field:

The Old; An Idea; Old Again:
Michael Baron of MetsBlog, writes, "The Chicago White Sox have bought out the 2010 option for 36 year old outfielder Jermaine Dye, making him a free agent."

Baron continues, "The option called for $12 million for 2010, but the White Sox opted to buy him out for $950,000."

Although "Dye finished the year hitting .250 with 27 home runs and 81 RBI for the Sox," one can't help but wonder if we're looking at a Gary Sheffield Jr. in 2010 or a legitamate, albeit skill-declining, veteran left fielder for the Mets next season.

Granted $12 million is a bit much for ANY team (even those cross town Champs) to sign the aging outfielder but for the right price and for one (maybe 2) year(s), I can't say I wouldn't mind seeing those left field fans replace their Sheff Hats with Tye-Dye shirts.

Some "don't like the idea of going after second tier players unless they are complimentary, and... certainly don’t feel comfortable with the Mets chasing aging superstars and hoping they can either catch lightening in a bottle or hoping that a player can sustain a prior level of productivity...". But that's the sensible way of looking at it and it hasn't done squat for us in the past 23 years.

2010 Left Fielder:
The two organizations that will have the greatest tolerance for the long-term dollars are the Cardinals or Mets. In regards to Matt Holliday, that is. Minaya is working to keep his job, as EddiePerez23 pointed out, so don't look for Omar to put his eggs into an aging basket in Dye. Anything more than 6 years for Holliday is proposterous and, with Scott Boras as his agent, don't expect an easy 5 year signing. Some trials and tribulations later... we're looking at Meet the Matt in left field.

First Base:

The Old:
After an encouraging finish to 2008, the power-hitting first baseman Carlos Delgado was betrayed by a torn labrum in his hip and missed all but 26 games in 2009. Daniel Murphy, Jeremy Reed and Co. were not able to man the position, let alone make up for the power you expect from a first baseman.

An Idea:
Delgado is not the craziest of ideas when you really think about it. As Carlos Beltran, his good buddy, said yesterday, "A healthy Delgado will give you 30 HR's and a 100 RBI season." I would say those numbers, at this point in Carlos' career, are a tad inflated but who ever said Beltran was quite the mathematician?

2010 First Baseman:
I'm going with Adam LaRoche. Shocker? Well, not really. LaRoche, who split the 2009 season with the Pirates, Braves and Red Sox, is 30 years old and batted .277 with 25 HR and 83 RBIs. Granted his .avg needs improvement if he is going to play for a serious contender who wants to be more than your "average playoff team" but a 2-3 year deal for this man is something Omar Minaya should consider, even though LaRoche is said to be "streak at times." He can pave the way for future Hall of Famer Ike Davis; or at least that's what Omar is hyping him up to be. Daniel Murphy (another hyped-up-Omar-product) will play the bench.


The Old:
The Mets really haven't solidified this position ever since the Piazza days. Paul Lo Duca was a nice player but his mouth, age and declining set of skills caused him to get the boot. Brian Schneider came in here advertised as the "defensive catcher" but he didn't perform behind the plate as the Mets would've liked. He couldn't hit if his job depended on it - actually it sort of did - and he now joins 27 other free agent catchers looking for a job behind the plate.

An Idea:
We're looking at two Type A players in the free agent market. Victor Martinez will most likely be picked up by the Red Sox for $7.7 million (Update: Wednesday 2:40pm - Martinez was picked up), leaving us with (we'll take him!) Bengie Molina.

The right handed catcher is 35 years old (turning 36 in July) and is in the league for 11 years. This man is everything Brian Schneider was not. Granted he only hit .265 in 2009, but his 20 home runs and 80 RBI's make up for his below-average, er, average. Molina made about $6 million in each of the past 2 years with the San Francisco Giants and according to my thorough analysis - is worth, yes, a 2 year deal. The Mets will likely go with Omir Santos as their backup, if this scenario were to unfold.

When 2011 rolls around, the Mets are looking at 23 year old catcher Josh Thole as one who will be ready to tackle the majors. For those, such as Joe Janish of Mets Today, who don't like the idea of Thole, either catching or backing up the starting catcher, in 2011 - maybe we'll postpone his true Mets debut until 2012. It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world IF Molina were to take Thole under his wings in 2011 but all this is not for now. We'll discuss 2011/2012 when appropriate.

As Ken Davidoff wrote for Newsday, "The Giants are likely to offer Molina salary arbitration, according to a person familiar with San Francisco thinking, as they would like to bring back the eldest of the catching Molina brothers. Once Molina gets the arbitration offer, then the Mets would have to surrender a draft pick as well as the money necessary to land him."

Davidoff continues, "Because the Mets, having finished 70-92 this past season, draft seventh overall, their first-round pick is protected. So they would have to give up their second-round pick, and - should they sign additional Type A free agents - their third-round, fourth-round selection and so on."

Thanks for the math lesson, Ken.

2010 Catchers:
Bengie ("Did you know his middle name was Jose?") Molina and Omir Santos.

...other positions coming soon... what, already?... it's not like you're paying for this stuff...
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Monday, November 16, 2009

Andrew Vazzano of made a sweet find this morning.

"I caught the last end of a commercial for a cell phone," Vazzano wrote. "The baseball team featured looked a lot like the Buffalo Bisons uniforms."

He continued, "AT&T has sponsored the Bisons for 10 years, according to Buffalo Business First." Why is that so? They probably didn't have to pay all that much for it, while now they're able to post their ads for all Bills fans to see.

Andrew concludes, "Unfortunately, and in typical Mets fashion, Carl Shouse tore his hamstring in the third inning and missed the rest of the season."

Good-en's Day

Happy 45th, Doc!

Count Me In!

Sunday, November 15, 2009

The Mets made a surprise move off the field this past Saturday signing one of the most illustrious accountants of all time to help them avoid any involvement in future Ponzi schemes. The Mets signed "The Count" from Sesame Street.

Some call it shocking, others call it mind boggling, while we here at the Mets Underground call it, "shocking and mind boggling." (What? We didn't combine nothing.)

The Count was first interviewed for the Mets LF job but was seen counting all the Dodgers paraphernalia at Citi Field when the Wilpons discovered his knack for numbering things.

His agent, Omarluffugus, did not return our phone calls.

We expect a press conference to be held tomorrow, Monday, at 1:23:45 pm.

Diet Coke Eruption

Friday, November 13, 2009

Having a rough day already? Do not fear...

...Mike Francesa is here to let you know that it could always be worse!

...So wait, is Andy Pettitte a starting pitcher or not...

Musical'd Up

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

I must say, this man, is quite the talent.

Tirico Suave takes a regular phone call (which I happened to hear on the radio today at about 2:15) and turns it into a video/musical masterpiece.

Here is what Suave wrote on his site preceding the unveiling of his new YouTube hit:

Big Mikey decided to opine on the Knicks during today’s show. Considering he
hasn’t watched a Knicks game since 1999, it was a peculiar direction to take the

Not surprisingly, it didn’t end well.

When asked by a caller why NY would be an attractive landing place for free agents in 2010, Mike stumbled and uttered these brilliant words: “Because da city is New York.”

Translation: Mikey has been listening to Jay-Z’s “Empire State of Mind” on repeat.

This kind of dripping New Yawk arrogance isn’t rare, but it is video-worthy. With that said, enjoy Big Mikey’s premiere video with Jay-Z.

Mik-Z in da house!
Props to Kranepool for the find.

Hey, Man!

So Jon Heyman loves to talk and poke at others but he can't take a poke and jab himself? Tisk, tisk.

Here is a tweet from Heyman (in black) with a rebuttal from me (in blue):

His immediate reaction? He blocks me from receiving his tweets.

My decision two weeks ago to cancel my SI subscription has now been fully validated.

Thanks for nothing, Jon Gayman.

Play GM; Go Ahead It's Free

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Today, I asked my followers on Twitter:

"Would you trade Mike Pelfrey (1 year left), Fernando Martinez and Daniel Murphy to the Jays for Lyle Overbay and Roy Halladay (1 year)?"

The "Yes" Group

metschick28: yes.

Kranepool: I'll drive those "X-Mets" to the airport and buy them brand new luggage to get Halladay.

Magus978: Would they even consider that without spitting in our faces?

TheRopolitans: Hell, I'd drive them to Toronto.

ViMed26: I'll pay the tolls lol.

CBSGreenLantern: If I'm the Mets I do that in a heartbeat. Wells in a different situation could be much better and Halladay is best in biz.

tommyjets: Hell yeah, but Mets should try and sign him to extension before trade goes thru.

Frank_Guate: if we have to send those players I AGREE!!!!!!

JonBraunstein Yes, I would, but only if we can re-sign Halladay.

The NO's

_holman_: I would not, I rather keep my farm full. Unless roy agree's to a sign and trade with atleast 4 years.

trmbonemulligan: thats a terrible trade, if Minaya was the Blue Jays GM EVEN he wouldn't do that.

brianjtang: Trade our youngsters for a one year rental and a career .265 hitter? No.

These People Didn't Answer But If They Did

CarlosBeltran15: Who cares? Donate to my organization.

FakeFredWilpon: Serenity Now! Serenity Now!!!

I would do it but I wouldn't trade my 3 numba one shows for anything!

BarackObama: Change? Change is good.

You didn't answer? Fret not. You can answer in the comment section or become famous* and I'll answer what you would've answered.**

* - You must be famous for over 3 months without committing an act that disgraces your family, neighborhood and/or religion. American Idol winners are not considered "famous" unless voted again by Americans on whether they think they've earned the description of "famous".

** - Read the first asterisk's definition in the mega quick post-commercial voice.

Watch for the Hot Stove, Wolf

Monday, November 9, 2009

"Enjoy the Hot Stove ... just don't get burned from it."

That was my mentality going into this off-season and hopefully it will pay baseball dividends.

I decided to use divine intervention, albeit not the best of ways, to choose which starting pitcher the Mets should go after and eventually sign for 2010. I let "Google Images" be my guide.

Thank you, Google.

"What is he talking about," you shout emphatically inside your head. I'll tell you - breathe.

Michael Baron of MetsBlog asked on his Twitter feed, "Would you like to see the Mets tender (John) Maine, or non-tender him and sign (Randy) Wolf to a 2 yr deal?"

"Well, he isn't a youngster anymore, although, he had pretty good stuff in 2009," I said to my 3 year old dog, Endy.

I thought, "I'll pop Wolf's name into 'The Google' (as Mike Francesa called it last week) and I'll get my vibes from there." After sorting through a few images of Randy with an actual wolf's head (some really bad photoshopping) - I found my answer:

Wolf, Veteran; Haunting, Old.

"Uh, Michael," I tweeted back, "When do we start tendering Maine?"

Roll Those Dyce!

Friday, November 6, 2009

Michael Baron of MetsBlog, writes, "The Chicago White Sox have bought out the 2010 option for 36 year old outfielder Jermaine Dye, making him a free agent."
Baron continues, "The option called for $12 million for 2010, but the White Sox opted to buy him out for $950,000."

Although "Dye finished the year hitting .250 with 27 home runs and 81 RBI for the Sox," one can't help but wonder if we're looking at a Gary Sheffield Jr. in 2010 or a legitamate, albeit skill-declining, veteran left fielder for the Mets next season.

Granted $12 million is a bit much for ANY team (even those cross town Champs) to sign the aging outfielder but for the right price and for one year, I can't say I wouldn't mind seeing those left field fans replace their Sheff Hats with Tye-Dye shirts.

Sterling Attempts To Hit Waldman, Fails (Video)

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Wait. For. It.

...what would you do without my keen analysis on the situation?...

...oh, and John was treated for his post game seizure with some homemade Jewish chicken soup - courtesy of Suzyn Waldman's cooking before the 3rd game of the 1998 World Series...

This Aint Phone-y...

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

MLB offers fans, for those that don't have a simple television, the chance to watch the game from their cell phone. Granted they offer this opportunity on an iPhone but why pay for it?

Find a friend who possesses a blackberry and you're in business.

Understood that it's a tad easier to find a television over a blackberry but what if you're stranded in a dorm room from 1936? Boy, do I have the (free) answer for you...
This past Sunday, Mets Underground tweeted about attaining a "4 Year Subscription (104 Issues) to ESPN Magazine for just $3.44 - Shipping Included." It came out to about 3 cents an issue. (Sorry folks, that deal has since ended). And today, we give you: VUIVISION.
This site, when accessed from one's (or a super nice friend's) blackberry is a click away from streaming NBC,CBS, Fox and ABC in an ultra clear fashion.
Enjoy it.
...Don't miss out while it lasts (for now)...or until the CW11 takes the rights to broadcast the World Series...
UPDATE: The site's twitter feed claims they are starting to charge tomorrow (Thursday).

Raul Ibanez and J.C. (Not Romero)

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Ken Auerbach, a man with trivia in his blood, recently sent me these photos of a recent "great observation":

One of the NY Post writers said that Raul Ibanez and Jiminy Cricket are lookalikes:

Someone told Ken, "they even slide similarly."

...For someone up there in age, Ibanez sure did make a lot of noise in the Phillies outfield... Okay, that was an attempted cricket reference.... Sue me...

...If Jiminy is holding the umbrella in his left hand since he's left-handed, then there's another similarity...

Johnny Be Fast

Monday, November 2, 2009

The Social Media Guide, Mashable, writes, "As the World Series between the New York Yankees and the Philadelphia Phillies heats up, fans are turning to the web in droves to capture and replay its most exciting moments."

"Last night’s game four in Philadelphia was certainly no exception. The game, tied in the top of the ninth, featured a key double steal by the Yankees’ Johnny Damon. Given that double steals are quite rare in the game of baseball, and the fact that this one helped lead to a Yankees win, the clip has become somewhat of an online commodity."

Sports Videos, News, Blogs

Mashable continues, "It’s an important moment that may go down in baseball history, and web searchers are clamoring to check out the incredible climatic scene..."

Mets Underground reminds its' devoted readers that this feat is nothing new to the Mets' fan's keen eye. Why, before this season started, Jose Reyes stole third base (from first) without even stopping...

Johnny being Jose. Amen.

Your Congress Hard At Work

An irate friend writes to me, "This is one of their exhausting three day work weeks. Let's vote the bums out. Let's get rid of their lifelong healthcare, their superb retirement plan they voted in for themselves, their voting for their own pay raises, their taking perks on our taxes."

He continues emphatically, "House Minority Leader Lawrence F. Cafero Jr., R-Norwalk, pictured standing, far right, speaks while colleagues Rep. Barbara Lambert, D-Milford and Rep. Jack F. Hennessy, D-Bridgeport, play solitaire Monday night as the House convened to vote on a new budget."

The guy sitting in the row in front of these two is on Facebook, and the guy behind Hennessy is checking out the baseball scores. These are the folks that can't get the budget out by Oct. 1st.

So, we’ve got a 30 day budget extension. Well, guess what, 30 days from now we will be in the same boat. This makes it easy for the news reporters as all they have to do is recycle the headlines.

And these yo-yo’s will still be playing solitaire.

...Whether Photo Shop was used in this image is for you to decide...Also, this is baseball related since the back computer has ESPN's home page open with a picture of (I'm gonna say) Andy Pettitte on the mound...Take that, blog critics!....

S.I. = Stop It!

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Being a Mets fan, can you blame me for not wanting to sit there on the couch and watch a World Series game featuring 2 teams which in on-your-block terms would equate to 2 very annoying (and wealthy) (and successful) (and uhh) neighbors? I didn't think so.

So off the couch I got and I waddled (yeah, it's been a long weekend, #Nachos #Burgers #MoreNachosAndBurgers) to my desk to clean out what my wife calls, "If Mess met Mrs. Mess and they had a Kid Mess....". Yeah, it wasn't pretty.

Unfortunately for me, I had left the TV on in the other room and I was able to hear Joe Buck and Tim McCarver fantasize about, er, call Jayson Werth's first home run of the night. Great... Now I had 2 chores on my hands. 1) Organizing and trashing piles of papers and magazines large enough to rebuild whatever that California Forest Fire destroyed back in the summer... and 2) Toning out the Philly Phanatics on FOX.

Towards the end of my task (A.K.A. - 3 hours and 23 paper cuts later), I saw IT. No, not a proper health care proposal. I'm referring to "The Headline." That which caused this all to happen. The Magazine. The Curse. The... the-e... the... THING!

After much profanity, I tossed it into the empty "Burn and throw ashes in ocean" pile and thought, "Aha, good riddance to that memory."

But, somewhere, not too far away, (12 feet to be exact), I heard those voices again; the voices of 2 crooked men struggling to come to terms with the fact that a nearly $1 billion team from the other side of New York had pulled out yet another victory

As I stared at David Wright atop the pile - I began to scream along with him.

...Eli From Brooklyn is survived by his 3 year old dog, Endy, a half used Tissue Box, and a blog post which predicted this all to be...